Dumb Thief

11 Aug

As expected, my drunk room mates entered at about 4. Loud whispering, back slaps and yahooing – the usual shit. There were 2 groups, one French and one English, who it seemed had been drinking together. My other sober room mate was a girl. The shit lasted for about half an hour. I woke up early – 6:45 – with plans to visit Auschwitz. If you get there before 10am it’s free entry (ie you don’t need a tour guide to get in) and the bus leaves at 7:50.

HOWEVER: I noticed my shorts were in a different position to where I’d left them last night – closer to my neighbours bunk. I grabbed them and checked my wallet and camera. Camera was there, but my wallet was missing 50 euro. I waited a minute then went apeshit. OK, so leaving my wallet in my shorts was lax of me, but it was right next to me on top of a cupboard. I shook the guy on the middle bunk awake. They were English. I tell him I’m missing 50 euro. Back and forth a few standoffish comments (fuck you where the fuck is my fucking money). He showed me his wallet, and it didn’t have much in there. By then most people are awake but I had the upper hand – no hang over. I asked the guy on the bottom bunk (fuck you where the fucking is my fucking money). He was a lot quieter, but again, no money in his wallet. By now I’m realising there will be no end to this – how do I identify 50 euro as mine? The guy on the top bunk starts mumbling ‘where’s my wallet?’. I stood up on the ladder and told him to look under his pillow (fuck you, look under your fucking pillow like all your fucking dipshit friends did). He pulls out a camera case but no wallet. Fuck. I return fire with the middle bunk man, who insists they aren’t thieving tossers. Top bunk guy pulls out a $20 note from his camera bag. A $20 AUSTRALIAN note! “You fucking…” I grab the bag off him and find my 50 euro, along with some coins and a locker key. I gave him the once over, gave his mate in the middle a once over, packed my stuff and went to the bathroom. Now that I’d recovered I still needed to make it to Auschwitz. After my quick shower – heart still beating a 100 times an hour – the thief is waiting in the lobby. I’m glad that I’m taller than him. He says he’s sorry, but he can’t find his wallet or his locker key, he thinks his key was in his camera bag. After much unhelpful comments from me (fuck you I took your key – you’re the fucking thief!). I let him look at my wallet where the dumbarse thought I had his key. Of course, it was in my pocket. I left smiling that he was going to lose his 20zl deposit.

But my smile was shortlived as I didn’t make it to the bus in time and my plans for today were thwarted. OK, so I hadn’t really looked in to it, just knew a bus left at 7:50 and I had to get there before 10. I couldn’t even find the bus terminal! But I did get myself sorted. The bus takes an hour and 20 minutes and costs 8zl. My plan had been to do Auschwitz, come back for the night, then head to Wroclaw tomorrow. Obviously that’s screwed up now. New plan: see Auschwitz tomorrow, and depeding on what time I get back to Krakow either train to Wroclaw or (more probably) spend another night in Krakow.

Back to the hostel for breakfast of cereal, coffee and jam sandwiches. Thankfully I didn’t run into my British friends. My head was pounding – two nights of shit sleep – but the coffee helped. More than anything, I didn’t know what to do today. I stumbled upon a traditional market. Was great, with many elderly Poles in it. Stalls sold clothes, fruit, baked goods, lollies. Tempted to fork out 8zl for a kilo of strawberries but thought I’d make myself sick. So I went with an eclair instead. Then off to some retail therapy. I went to the Galleria, a mall next to the train station, and roamed there. It was air conditioned and affordable, two good things! I figured buying clothes here is cheaper than the Netherlands and I’ve staked out a jumper. Big gamble, though, is that I’ll buy everything in Warsaw before I leave. Cheap salmon sandwich for lunch, and free use of the toilets! I went to town! Clothes are cheap here, but sometimes the quality is debatable – like Supre maybe. I came back to the hostel. On the way I passed by a fountain that had kids, stripped down to their underwear playing in it. I remembered last night, when the water had been lit up green and red and blue, and it pulsed to the rhythm of Chopin. Very cool.

I read and napped a little. Should have for longer. Outside I dawdled around aimlessly. I found an internet cafe and worked out my options for travelling. The buskers were out in full force – an Edward Scissorhands impersonater, mimes, puppeteers, break dancers, bubble blowers, statues… Didn’t pay once unsurprisingly. Sank two Tyskie beers and wrote my diary underneath a sky that looked painted. The stage from yesterday was packed up, moved 50m down and was now host to a new theatre show. I didn’t hang for that one, instead going to see Trainspotting in a packed cinema. Was great seeing it on the big screen with a lively audience. Had another zapiekanka for dinner – really good. As I approached my hostel near midnight I could see a light on and a party in action…my room. Thankfully the Brits had moved on, and the party left shortly.

2 Responses to “Dumb Thief”

  1. traveltrekker August 25, 2010 at 10:41 pm #

    Unbelievable. You spent nearly a year in Asia with a laptop, ipod etc in some really dodgy places and didn’t lose anything (apart from your dignity when you had that silly haircut).

    Then in Europe you share your humble abode with French and English, you get robbed. Just proves you can’t trust frogs or poms. Good on you for waking them up and imposing a bit of Australian culture. No doubt you impressed them with your linguistic eloquence.

    Perhaps you could try the same trick in the next hostel. If they were all so pissed, they would have no idea if they stole off you or not. Easy way to make $50. (I tried to do a Euro symbol but my keyboard hates french and germans as well)

    Did you take the key back and get the deposit?

    Detective Sargent Peter

  2. Diane Ford August 25, 2010 at 11:57 pm #

    You bloody idiot! Glad you DID get the 50 back.

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